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Hacked by CoupDeGraceGreetz:Hmei7, BrokenPipe, SimSimi, L4663r666h05t, AntonKil, d3b~x, Index Php, Mdn_Newbie, Sultan Haikal, Brian Kamikaze
Many parents believe that children spending equal time with each parent is ‘fair’ though how often it is a fair arrangement for the children is debatable. Men (mainly, but not exclusively, abusive men) do not like paying maintenance for their children and will fight through the court for 50/50 time with their children in order
Fact finding hearings are essential when there are serious allegations of abuse. They are more like a criminal trial than any other hearing in the family court and they can last from two days to several weeks. Not surprisingly, most parents are completely wrung out both physically and emotionally, and often financially too, at the
I was taken aback when an alarmed client told me she had no idea that a final hearing meant that she would have to give evidence and be cross-examined. ‘Final hearing’ sounds so innocent, she said. Now I come to think about it I realise it’s part of the legal jargon we lawyers take for
Sheila has recently concluded her financial proceedings but she’s lost her son in the process. She’s given me permission to share her story as some of it will help others. When you’re trying to negotiate a financial agreement with a narcissist the crucial words, as Sheila says below, are ‘a settlement you can live with’.
I’ve seen some confusion over these recently, as well as a template form that people are finding online which is incorrect, and even courts ordering a position statement when they mean a witness statement! Briefly, witness statements are your evidence i.e. what you will tell the court you’ve seen and heard, and position statements are
A new study in Wales of children involved in court proceedings has found that they are more likely than their peers to be anxious or depressed, although the study didn’t look at whether they may just have been adversely affected by the separation of their parents rather than the court proceedings. Other research has highlighted
I dipped in to some of the Johnny Depp v Amber Heard libel trial and I have seen lots of comments about it, mainly on social media. And I’ve been shocked by how seemingly everyone is so firmly either on one side or the other – though mainly on the side of JD. Personally I’m
You have to try really hard to get into trouble in the family court. People lose sleep about filing a statement a day or two late but without asking themselves what will happen if they don’t comply exactly with a court direction or order. Usually the answer is nothing, and of course that upsets and
Litigants in person often complain to me about barristers lying to the court. They draft position statements full of lies and then after the hearing they draft court orders saying things were agreed or ordered when they weren’t. Let’s get this straight from the outset: barristers are not allowed to lie, or to mislead the
We were all horrified when five people, including a child, were shot dead in Plymouth last August – this is the UK, not the US, and we don’t do mass shootings here. At least, not too often. The police are supposed to police gun licences but they don’t have time to do this properly and
Are you upset about Partygate? Personally I don’t understand why people who voted for a narcissist are so upset because he’s behaving like one. And since Boris has been caught out, many are mystified as to why he won’t step down like any ‘normal’ person would. They saw the fight Trump put up to cling
We’ve waited a long time for ‘no fault’ divorce ie a divorce without having to make allegations of unreasonable behaviour or adultery if you don’t want to wait until you’ve been separated for two years. The Divorce, Dissolution and Separation Act 2020 received royal assent in June 2020 and is finally due to come into
It’s just arrived – my new book is finally published! When I finished writing it in May I didn’t imagine it would take this long before I saw it in print but it turned out that the writing was the easy bit. Even if it did take two years. That said, I know the writing
How does shared care (50/50 custody) work with a narcissist? Short answer: badly. But unfortunately until the courts have more understanding of domestic abuse, and some knowledge of personality disorders, they're unlikely to stop making orders for parents to share the care of their children. In an ideal world, shared care can work well for
I’ve had a few clients recently who’ve received orders or correspondence from the court which they’ve failed to understand. Or, rather, the court has failed to put it into plain English which a non-professional can understand. And clarity is so important in court proceedings. Firstly there was the client who applied for her ex to
After two years in the making, the Channel 4 Dispatches programme about domestic abuse and the family courts was finally shown last week. If you missed it you can find it here, but beware if you’re going through the family court in children proceedings as you may find it triggering or distressing. Louise Tickle, journalist,
My lockdown reading included Lundy Bancroft’s ‘Why does he do that?’ and I was surprised to learn that he believes only about one in twelve abusers has a personality disorder like narcissistic or borderline personality disorder. Lundy Bancroft's perspective is a little different to others as he’s spent most of his career working with abusive men
Having escaped from the daily abuse of a narcissistic ex, usually what upsets and worries parents the most is how to deal with the abuse, lies, gaslighting and neglect their children are still subjected to. I’ve turned to Sarah Squires (The Nurturing Coach) and Una Archer (Parenting After Separation) for some expert help with this:
The Court of Appeal has finally delivered judgement in the four appeals relating to fact finding hearings and the impact of domestic abuse on contact. If you missed my previous post about these appeals you can read it here: It was a big event with all those heavyweight barristers and we had high hopes of